RESUMEN
OBJECTIVES: To examine in-depth experiences of loneliness and freedom after late-life divorce from an intergenerational familial/dyadic perspective in a family-oriented society that also values self-determination. Considering the expansion of late-life divorce, it is important to understand its consequences for the family wellbeing. METHOD: According to phenomenology tradition, data was collected through 51 semi-structured qualitative interviews, comprised from 7 family units (n = 33) including all/most family members and 9 parent-child dyads (n = 18), using thematic-analysis and dyadic interview-analysis principles. Analyzing family units enables a more complex examination of the phenomena, providing a holistic view of family life. RESULTS: Loneliness and freedom experienced simultaneously was the most common. A gap was identified between generations regarding benefits and costs of late-life divorce. Whereas most divorcees emphasized the benefits of freedom, most of their adult-children mainly described the disadvantages of loneliness, perceiving both loneliness and freedom as negative. CONCLUSION: Late-life divorce is a complex experience comprised of both loneliness and freedom. Each generation experiences the benefits and costs of late-life divorce differently. Unique aspects of freedom and loneliness at old age in a socio-cultural context located between self-determination and family-oriented are discussed, including strategies of coping with loneliness. Implications for families and professionals are presented.
RESUMEN
Divorce rates have dropped in the United States, except for couples over 50 where they are rising steeply, along with rates of late-life recoupling. Both stepcouples and their young adult and adult children in new older stepfamilies are often surprised to find themselves facing many of the same challenges that younger stepfamilies do. Some challenges are even intensified by the decades-long relationships and additional layers of extended family that come with recoupling after mid-life. Stepfamilies formed in later life must also negotiate decisions about estate planning and elder care among stakeholders who often have sharply divergent agendas before there is time to establish trusting relationships. This article describes the "normal" challenges facing stepcouples who come together over age 50. It provides evidence-informed guidance for therapists in meeting these challenges on three levels of clinical work: Psychoeducational, Interpersonal, and Intrapsychic/Intergenerational. As in younger stepfamilies, "family therapy" must usually begin in subsystems-often the adult stepcouple and parent-adult child. The article then describes a particularly fraught subgroup of recouplers: over-50 fathers and their new partners, where the dad's young adult or adult daughter is very unhappy with his new relationship. In these latter stepfamilies, father-daughter repair must precede stepfamily bonding. Stepfamilies that are preceded by a partner's death and those that begin with affairs are also discussed. Finally, some "easy wrong turns" for therapists are described.